My toilet Flush occupied Primetime in my Brain,as the sight of it (not a pleasant one at all!) crossed by me again.It has been two weeks and I hadn't taken any significant steps towards making some Serious money using that.It was getting pretty dark and as I walked past the Shop in my street corner,an idea struck me.I was pretty desperate to make some cash(That company thing just dropped in and said Hello).I moved to the shopkeeper and asked him for 'Maal',and tried to strike a conversation.It was pretty tough,given my Hindi was sounding Greekish to him.I couldn't blame him for that!
"Eh maal bahuth acha hai" I knew these Acha lines properly since I had rehersed just in case I ran into some hot chick.Complimenting her by saying,"aapka voice bahuth acha hai" would be one hell of a start!
The nod was pretty gentle,which I assumed to be a "Yes.and please get the Fuck out of here".Very very kind.To have a please word before the F word is way too gentle.
"Kahan se mila"I asked him sounding hopeful of a reply
Ten Minutes later,I was on my way back home giving hi fives to invisible hands stretching out to me.The train is waiting....
Monday, June 30, 2008
Thursday, June 26, 2008
DreamLand...
I was unconscious of the fact that my mouth had become a new shelter for the Mosquitoes.I had them opened for so long,that the' mozzies' went into my oesophagus,clearly assuming it to be some sort of play ground.I spit it out,slowly regaining my senses.Hell! There was atleast 3kgs right in front of my eyes!I knew I was in a mess. My eyes refused to come back to normalcy.It didn't require a Ramanujam to figure out that there was a fortune in there.Almost instantly,my mind shifted to the section I loved most,Dream Land....The best part of Dream Land were the girls,and boy they came in huge numbers,clad in the earliest costume known to Mankind (:D).And most importantly,they were HOT.(Yeah ,H-O-T).
Its the only place on earth where :
(a)You want to be the catcher,in a game of Running and Catching.
(b)Even physics lessons turn out to be miraculously interesting.(The Law of equality holds good in DL!)
(c)And you are in total concentration.
The suit case closed on my hands ,Ouch!! My stay@ Dreamland was cut short by the grey coloured "SOB".I was still unsure of what to do with my new acquisition(Like I had acquired Land Rover or something).The returns were huge if I get into the game.But the risks were bigger,and anyways I didn't want to die a virgin!
I moved the suitcase to a safer location in my apartment.(there were only 2 rooms,and the bathroom wasn't inhabited by the rats).I didn't want my house to be filled with Drugged Rats.Not my fault,if they do,cause the Bastards don't smell it before they nibble.How on earth can a living being eat up a man's trousers which haven't been washed for two months??
I took it to the highest location possible in my room,the flush doesn't work in the toilet,and I stuffed the packets inside it.
Clearly,this was too much for my mind to handle,but at the same time Called for Celebration!!!I took a ten rupee note,and stuffed some into it. Slowly I was flying back to Dreamland where the grass is green and girls were pretty.....
Its the only place on earth where :
(a)You want to be the catcher,in a game of Running and Catching.
(b)Even physics lessons turn out to be miraculously interesting.(The Law of equality holds good in DL!)
(c)And you are in total concentration.
The suit case closed on my hands ,Ouch!! My stay@ Dreamland was cut short by the grey coloured "SOB".I was still unsure of what to do with my new acquisition(Like I had acquired Land Rover or something).The returns were huge if I get into the game.But the risks were bigger,and anyways I didn't want to die a virgin!
I moved the suitcase to a safer location in my apartment.(there were only 2 rooms,and the bathroom wasn't inhabited by the rats).I didn't want my house to be filled with Drugged Rats.Not my fault,if they do,cause the Bastards don't smell it before they nibble.How on earth can a living being eat up a man's trousers which haven't been washed for two months??
I took it to the highest location possible in my room,the flush doesn't work in the toilet,and I stuffed the packets inside it.
Clearly,this was too much for my mind to handle,but at the same time Called for Celebration!!!I took a ten rupee note,and stuffed some into it. Slowly I was flying back to Dreamland where the grass is green and girls were pretty.....
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
The Swap
The corner of the street was occupied by two heavily built men ,clad in a black casual attire.One of them,glanced at the watch and shook his head.Very easy to make out that he was in disgust.Another walked into the scene with a suitcase .He looked a bit old , vertically challenged and tensed.Drenched in sweat , he breathed out heavily.
"Twenty Minutes late,We were getting worried.Where the Fuck where you?" the guy in black asked.
" The train ran a bit late.Besides I should be the one complaining.Tough to dodge them every time. And with a tag of 10k around me,every God damned money sucking bastard in this city is looking to nail me down.The moustache gets irritating and my wig itches a lot! Trafficking is no easy joke , dear" almost immediately removing his moustache and wig to complete his transformation. He appeared feminish ,yet possessed voice that boomed.
"We don't have much time do we?? " he remarked as the suitcase switched hands.
"Pretty light.Do you have it??"
"If the notes are real, yes." came the reply.They didn't get along with each other ,the frequent transactions did their rapport little good.
" Guess, I won't be seeing you for sometime to come....Adios" the man said pulling out his gun and firing ,almost immediately.
The bullets sank right into the little man's forehead.
"Twenty Minutes late,We were getting worried.Where the Fuck where you?" the guy in black asked.
" The train ran a bit late.Besides I should be the one complaining.Tough to dodge them every time. And with a tag of 10k around me,every God damned money sucking bastard in this city is looking to nail me down.The moustache gets irritating and my wig itches a lot! Trafficking is no easy joke , dear" almost immediately removing his moustache and wig to complete his transformation. He appeared feminish ,yet possessed voice that boomed.
"We don't have much time do we?? " he remarked as the suitcase switched hands.
"Pretty light.Do you have it??"
"If the notes are real, yes." came the reply.They didn't get along with each other ,the frequent transactions did their rapport little good.
" Guess, I won't be seeing you for sometime to come....Adios" the man said pulling out his gun and firing ,almost immediately.
The bullets sank right into the little man's forehead.
Inside the mind....
I continued to walk rather rapidly,yet composed manner to avoid any suspicions.Holding the suitcase tightly in one hand,I decided to take a puff.The smoke was helping me cool down and wash out any signs of nervousness.The case was pretty heavy and I was hoping I had struck something big.I caught a bus , and just for the sake of tradition(Tradition alone),took two wallets into my custody.Good old times rock baby!Of late, I had stepped on the gas a little bit,and was sure that if i continue in the same path,I would have a tag round my neck that said"SUITCASE SNATCHER" like "BISCUIT BANDITS".I hate being stereotyped, hence kept switching lines often.There was no BIBLE in this profession,yet there were certain minimum tasks that you had to complete like say, flicking wallets before you move on to bigger things..It was like learning alphabets before words.Not a theorem,but an axiom.!I was an amateur in this profession,I had to admit it,yet I was moving gradually up the ranks."This is for my company"I said to myself.What a lie that turned out to be!That was two weeks earlier.And after that , 2800 rupees in cash,two credit cards,four pounds of gold,three of silver and seven wrist watches.Hell! I have a market out here!!
Mankind has always fallen prey to greed.History is filled with examples,yet we never learn!I was no different,justifying the fact that I was a homosapien!
I took the last turn and almost by impulse my leg stopped .The shop was drawing me towards it! Damn..It doesn't hurt to try..Does it??I opened my apartment door, sat down and opened my suitcase.....
It was full of White powder.
Mankind has always fallen prey to greed.History is filled with examples,yet we never learn!I was no different,justifying the fact that I was a homosapien!
I took the last turn and almost by impulse my leg stopped .The shop was drawing me towards it! Damn..It doesn't hurt to try..Does it??I opened my apartment door, sat down and opened my suitcase.....
It was full of White powder.
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
All in a day's work!
The worst part of being on a high is the landing part.Thud!!All the bottomless wells,the endless seas and the angel with the wings carrying you up end and it takes around 15 minutes to realize that you were born human!I dragged myself to the washroom to clean up and boy ! I was looking Fu**ed up! I could feel my stomach barking and I searched the house frantically for left overs ,hoping that I would outsmart the rats in the hunt.I mustered up enough energy to get ready for another days' work.
9.30 am,
I helped myself to a copy of the "Indian Express".Yes , I am a thief,but a literate one though.After all , there were Bigger thieves out there,only difference they are licensed and I wasn't.And they wipe out the earnings of a billion people,I restrict myself to a negligable % of the lot.Like the Pulitzer's for the authors,Oscars for the actors,it was Politics for the Robbers.Like all faithful students,I aspired to be one among them!.
I boarded the train , and looked at the hour's probables.Hell Yeah! There were a few of them and I decided to pull up the oldest trick of them all.For a crowded city like Mumbai,I always wondered what's wrong with the people.How on earth do I stumble across a minimum of 10 people everyday carrying the same VIP alpha suitcase?(Yeah,the grey coloured ones,they show on ads).And one thing I love in the city ,are the crowded trains.They make your job simple and opens up a window of Oppurtunities!I zeroed in on my Kill,(like a murderer) kept my suitcase beside his and waited for the stop to arrive.As always there was a sea of people entering the train.There was a lot of pushing and pulling(Like in the 'd' box during a freekick:) ) and I decided to cash in on my oppurtune moment.I completed the switch and got out with the crowd.The even better part of Mumbai was the crowds never reduced !
9.30 am,
I helped myself to a copy of the "Indian Express".Yes , I am a thief,but a literate one though.After all , there were Bigger thieves out there,only difference they are licensed and I wasn't.And they wipe out the earnings of a billion people,I restrict myself to a negligable % of the lot.Like the Pulitzer's for the authors,Oscars for the actors,it was Politics for the Robbers.Like all faithful students,I aspired to be one among them!.
I boarded the train , and looked at the hour's probables.Hell Yeah! There were a few of them and I decided to pull up the oldest trick of them all.For a crowded city like Mumbai,I always wondered what's wrong with the people.How on earth do I stumble across a minimum of 10 people everyday carrying the same VIP alpha suitcase?(Yeah,the grey coloured ones,they show on ads).And one thing I love in the city ,are the crowded trains.They make your job simple and opens up a window of Oppurtunities!I zeroed in on my Kill,(like a murderer) kept my suitcase beside his and waited for the stop to arrive.As always there was a sea of people entering the train.There was a lot of pushing and pulling(Like in the 'd' box during a freekick:) ) and I decided to cash in on my oppurtune moment.I completed the switch and got out with the crowd.The even better part of Mumbai was the crowds never reduced !
Saturday, June 21, 2008
The Stop @ the shop
"Dada,ek cigarette packet dho " I told with my broken hindi(Give me two cigaratees).."Kaunsa Brand" came the reply..."Silk cut"I blurted..Well bigger brands would burn a hole in my wallet,rather set it on fire.. I was lighting the cigarette , man came to the shop and whispered to the old man for something in Marathi. ..I was reading him ,brown hair,black eyes , ruffled hair.I could guess he was in his late 30's. I took out the cigarette from my mouth @ which point came a packet filled with a white substance which took me by complete surprise..Surely,not!!
He left rather hurriedly and I asked the shop keeper for the same thing.I managed to tell him with my S!@t hindi that I wanted the same.He was a little cautious , but I assured him I was in no way related to the cops.In fact I hate them(hey! i am a robber!).I stuffed it into my pocket and rushed to my home..
@ Apartment..(E) Malad , Mumbai....
I opened the packet and observed it.(.Maybe I should try it..Maybe Not..Common trying is not gonna hurt..Besides life is meant for experimenting.)I was utterly confused and missed my gray matter dearly....Divided between the two opinions,I decided to try..Experimenting,is afterall the essence of science..And we live in a world of Science...
I emptied its contents on a paper....I poured the tobacco from the cigarette and filled it with the powder....I lit it up and inhaled.......It was a feeling of floating in mid air...All my problems seemed to vanish in thin air..And there I was shining amongst the stars,intoxicated.I was sinking into a bottomless well....
He left rather hurriedly and I asked the shop keeper for the same thing.I managed to tell him with my S!@t hindi that I wanted the same.He was a little cautious , but I assured him I was in no way related to the cops.In fact I hate them(hey! i am a robber!).I stuffed it into my pocket and rushed to my home..
@ Apartment..(E) Malad , Mumbai....
I opened the packet and observed it.(.Maybe I should try it..Maybe Not..Common trying is not gonna hurt..Besides life is meant for experimenting.)I was utterly confused and missed my gray matter dearly....Divided between the two opinions,I decided to try..Experimenting,is afterall the essence of science..And we live in a world of Science...
I emptied its contents on a paper....I poured the tobacco from the cigarette and filled it with the powder....I lit it up and inhaled.......It was a feeling of floating in mid air...All my problems seemed to vanish in thin air..And there I was shining amongst the stars,intoxicated.I was sinking into a bottomless well....
Friday, June 20, 2008
The Apartment
The Sun was preparing to bid adieu to the town of Mumbai ..I was taking a break from my hectic schedule (Hell , its a mind blowing profession) ..Cigarettes weren't my favourites ,but i had no other better work to do,so decided to create a few rings up the air..I had become accustomed to the smoke drilling through my throat and nose .It isn't what you exactly call intoxicating,yet it managed to make a person beg for more.
I started for my place,that was not exactly in the best of locales,yet there was something about it,which made me take the apartment.It was on the second floor,in the slums of Mumbai , dimly lit and with such a serene atmosphere that you could hear the clock ticking every second...
Maybe it was the isolation which had appealed to me or the darkness or maybe both.Whatever it was, I had managed to rent a decent(so called Decent) apartment on my own,with "MY" money.
I strolled through the slums listening to the screams of women in the neighbourhood screeching at their children , and the men snoring along the platform.It was yet another day in the lives of these people,a happy family they were,poor yet contended...
Greed had set inside me.The lust for money was larger than ever now...Satisfaction was becoming a peak too high to scale..I was prepared to risk my life to earn that extra penny more,and I could sense the change..
I started for my place,that was not exactly in the best of locales,yet there was something about it,which made me take the apartment.It was on the second floor,in the slums of Mumbai , dimly lit and with such a serene atmosphere that you could hear the clock ticking every second...
Maybe it was the isolation which had appealed to me or the darkness or maybe both.Whatever it was, I had managed to rent a decent(so called Decent) apartment on my own,with "MY" money.
I strolled through the slums listening to the screams of women in the neighbourhood screeching at their children , and the men snoring along the platform.It was yet another day in the lives of these people,a happy family they were,poor yet contended...
Greed had set inside me.The lust for money was larger than ever now...Satisfaction was becoming a peak too high to scale..I was prepared to risk my life to earn that extra penny more,and I could sense the change..
The 'S' route
The three coins were in front of me,they had reversed my fortunes(though 3 rupees can never be regarded as Fortune in your wildest of imagination..).Well if one rupee could reverse Rajini Kanth's fate in Sivaji,the movie (The villain gives him a one rupee coin , which our hero tosses horizontally,read HORIZONTALLY.But I do have to admit the fact,I enjoyed the coin getting flipped horizontally and yeah Vertically too)why can't it if not reverse ,atleast move it by say a few degrees!
I bought a blade for 50 ps , bun and a cup of tea.When the first piece of the bun , passed through my throat, i could feel my stomach expanding itself for its first prey in the last two days..What a feeling!!!!Better than anything in this whole damn world(..Read anything and Everything..yeah u got it right EVERYTHNG..)
I decided to kick start my new job , and went to the bus stop ...A crowded bus approached and set the conditions conducive for the first hit.I caught it and stood on the foot board, where in i got my first catch..Being a novice , didnt' help my cause either as i was struggling hard to maintain my footing..( I was loosing balance ,since i was shivering).I got down at a signal and ran for cover..Realizing that something was wrong,the guy turned back,but by then I was long gone..Thank you buddy!!
And Blimely!, what a start...368 bucks...I pinched myself just to prevent another heavy fall..(Ouch!!That hurt!)...S for (e) SCAPE!
I bought a blade for 50 ps , bun and a cup of tea.When the first piece of the bun , passed through my throat, i could feel my stomach expanding itself for its first prey in the last two days..What a feeling!!!!Better than anything in this whole damn world(..Read anything and Everything..yeah u got it right EVERYTHNG..)
I decided to kick start my new job , and went to the bus stop ...A crowded bus approached and set the conditions conducive for the first hit.I caught it and stood on the foot board, where in i got my first catch..Being a novice , didnt' help my cause either as i was struggling hard to maintain my footing..( I was loosing balance ,since i was shivering).I got down at a signal and ran for cover..Realizing that something was wrong,the guy turned back,but by then I was long gone..Thank you buddy!!
And Blimely!, what a start...368 bucks...I pinched myself just to prevent another heavy fall..(Ouch!!That hurt!)...S for (e) SCAPE!
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